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Friday, March 16, 2007

March Madness


Not the kind you think: I HATE this time of the year with a passion. Every sports radio station has 24/7 coverage of college basketball and it's annual "Road to the Final Four" marathon. I've got a brother in-law, Keith, who pours over bracketts like he's trying to decipher some ancient egyptian text while I call him everyday asking "How's your bracket look now" just to mess with him.



No, my March Madness is that time seems to come to a stop while I wait for the first of April and Opening Day. I don't want to hear the percentage's on when the 12th seed plays the 5th seed, or see 55 minutes of NCAA basketball on a 60 minute episode of Sports Center. I ABSOLUTELY do not need to see Dick Vitale and his bug eyes screaming about "PT Players" and "Diaper Dandies": Seriously, WHO TALKS like that? Listening to that man talk is about as enjoyable as listening to those idiots on CNN, or MSNBC, or wherever sit around and yell at each other for an hour.



What I want is a warm Spring night, with Orsillo and RemDawg in the booth laughing it up. I want Daisuke Matsuzaka on the hill mowing the hitters down, while Schilling and Beckett assume their position on the top step of the dugout. If you've never seen this, it's quite the scene: Schilling talks non-stop, while Beckett gets into a rythm of nod, lean, spit, nod, never saying a word back. Is he even listening? Or is he just hoping Schill will wear himself out, only to realize much to late that's impossible?



You can have the Final Four: I want the last inning, 1 man on and the Sox down by 1 when Papi comes stomping to the plate, followed 3 minutes later by the faint sound of "Dirty Water" being played while the big man circles the bases and Fenway goes wild. Give me Manny hitting them off the coke bottle, Lowell making like a Hoover vaccuum at third, sucking up everything that comes his way, and JD Drew roping doubles in the gap.



Most of all, give me that hour every night, before my kids head to bed, for Rakes to hop up in my lap and watch the first few innings with me. I love to watch his face when Manny or Papi come to bat, or when the ball is hit to the outfield, and when it's caught to hear him shout "He did it Dad; He DID it!"



16 Days, 18 hours, and 43 minutes until Opening Day.

39 comments:

Kaylee said...

No I am here til Thursday:) I like it here.I am looking forward to those walkoffs that PAPI gives us:) I am also looking forward to watchingg games with my boyfriend and brother(even though he dont understand it).

scott h said...

Oh come on Teddy boy. You know baseball is really at its best when its win or go home, every grounder ran out every foul ball chased to the track. Aug. madness baseball would be the bomb!!

Ted D said...

Scotty, this basketball stuff drives me up a tree. If I gotta see Dickie V acting like a mental patient one more time, I'll lose it.

One game bub? What kinda wacky thing is that? Best 3 outa 5, or 4 outa 7. THATS what I'm talking about. And looking back at that 3 game sweep the Royals gave you could have meant the difference in 1st place or the Wild Card.

(See 2005 Red Sox).

Kaylee said...

I agree with you ted this tournament sucks I am forced to watch it cause my cousin and his dad insist on it:) That is the only thing I hate about this trip:)

Ted D said...

Kaylee, sorry about that: I had to get after Scott, and forgot you: You are at ST until Thursday? Man, what a great vacation. How many more games are you going too?

15 and a boyfriend? I've already told Ciera she is being home schooled starting at age 12, and that boys are EVIL. Evil I tell you. :)

Kaylee said...

Yes my mom thinks I am to young but,I tell her i dont care.I am going to 3 more games.And I am not gunna let my cousin influence me anymore.He will not control me.:)

scott h said...

That's why you guy's don't mind a meatball sandwich pitch every third inning. I love baseball but give me the rock!! Kaylee your boyfriend is at ST? I would be flying you home so quick your head would be spinning!!!

Tex said...

so today on the plane this lady and I began discussing baseball...she says its those games where nothing happens...that bores her. I tell her thats when I pull out the handy dandy binoculars to check out just how tight the boys pants are and what the boys are doing in the dugout. :)

Stacy said...

As the wife of the aforementioned Keith (great fan of basketball) I think March Madness really means it drives the wives crazy! For some reason he needs his brackets, a highlighter, red marker and a pencil to keep track of the games.

It drives me nuts, but it's his favorite time of the year. Oh, and Ted, Keith LOVES Dick Vitale! :)

Ted D said...

Scotty, what exactly is a meatball sandwich pitch? You have GOT to start making yourself clear.

Tex, tight pants? Ugh. Unless we are talking about Kelly the Ball Girl, then I'm all for it!

Stacy, how's keiths bracket look this morning? ;) And Dickie V gives me the mother of all headaches: "He's a PT player BABY!"

Blech.

scott h said...

Hey Stacy, I read where men admire men whose personality remind them of their wives! So who are your Diaper Dandies? JUST KIDDING. TEx I refuse to help you anymore in that area. Ted have you heard if the Eagle has landed or not?

scott h said...

Come on Ted Meatball pitch , like what dice k tossed up to the Barney Fife dude last week not once but twice. then turned and watched it sail over the fence. You turn and watch a man go by you to the hoop and you are on the bench right beside me if I were coach.ST or no ST!!! I just had my Wheaties so bear with me. HOW ABOUT THEM DUKIES> GO GO NC

Ted D said...

Bub, what eagle are you referring to? And you are gonna be on Stacy's bad list.

Ted D said...

Well, a man of your age should be eating plenty of fiber Scott. You may want to switch to "Super Cleanse".

It's Spring Training man: it's PRACTICE. We talkin' about PRACTICE? C'mon now Scotty: you telling me NFL Pre Season games mean anything? :)

scott h said...

Eagle as in "Give me tree bark or give me death" I have lived on the thought of I would rather be on the list than off!

scott h said...

I won't watch pre football BOARING! but I still go by the idea of you play like you practice. And for the most part baseballers do but all this lets fly where it is warm and cozy sign autographes and sip Fuzzy Navels and toast the Man who has yet to throw a big league pitch wears me down. Now where are my brackets and I mean the one filled out in pencil!!!

Ted D said...

Oh, that eagle: far as I know the big move is taking place as we speak. he told me yesterday he went and got "broad band WiFi" which I think means he can get on his computer now. I guess that is meant as a warning to you and me.

Why does it not surprise me you do your bracketts in pencil? You must be the one guy you hear about every year who PICKED EVERY GAME CORRECTLY!

Kaylee said...

Yes scott my boyfriend is here.

Tex said...

Scotty and Tedy...let me have my fantasy with the tight pants!!!

you say fried I say baked

Ted D said...

Tex, like I said: if Kelly the Ball Girl is involved, I'm all for it. :)

scott h said...

Ted do you think Kaylee figured out I have two teenage daughters? Her reply was kinda of like a whipped hounddog! I bet Matt got the wango de tango system hooked up before the baby bed. BRING it on tree newt! TEx if Ted started talking about the blond on sports center last night you guys would leave like rats on a sinking ship! So lets keep it neutral! (ted did you see the blond on sportscenter last night!!)

Kaylee said...

Hey scott give me a break I just woke up:)

Ted D said...

Missed her Scotty: I avoid SC during basketball. I watch NESN. You need to go to NESN.com and check out Hazel Mae, post haste.

"tree newt". hehehe.

Yep, I think she could tell by that fatherly tone you had teenagers. And can you tell she is a teenager by her "I just woke up" at 12:30 pm! Just messin' with you kaylee. :)

I gotta figure out how to fix the time on this thing. I'm an hour behind.

Kaylee said...

Well when you go to bed at 3:00am that is what happens:)

scott h said...

Her fav's cal rip jr, hockey and Hootie I've made a new friend for life! Thanks Ted. Kaylee I bet you are hoping I will say "you made the bed now lie in it." but thats not going to happen!

Kaylee said...

Oh trust me I expect more than that out of you scott.

Ted D said...

Papelbon just gave up a leadoff HR and a walk, then started the DP and struck out Adam Dunn.

Boy is the real deal.

Kaylee, just take Scott with a grain of salt: he's been like this the 25 years or so I've known him!

Kaylee said...

That inning wasnt bad excpt for the home run:)BUt,nobody is perfect I guess!

Christine E. said...

Here Here! March madness is all everyone is talking about around here--and I am just waiting until baseball starts...

Kaylee, my dad used to say he wasn't going to let me date until I was 30--and car date until I was 37...LOL

Go Sox!

Kaylee said...

CHRISTINE,i WOULD HATE TO LIVE WHERE YOU ,LIVE THIS TIME OF YEAR!


you people are convining me that men and boys are evil maybe IO should get rid of him now.Oh how my mom would love that.

Ted D said...

Christine, I'm glad I'm not the only one. Living here in the middle of Tobacco Road, I'm considered a little strange by not eating, sleeping, and breathing basketball.

Yeah Kaylee, we men are pretty much worthless.

Kaylee said...

Women can be too sometimes:)

Christine E. said...

As George Carlin always says: "Here's all you have to know about men and women: women are crazy, men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid"

BUT there ARE some good men out there--you just have to wade through the not so good ones...:-)

Ted D said...

We lose, 2-1. Some positives though. The bullpen pitched 5 1/3 innings of scoreless relief, Pap had a lot of strikeouts, and only gave up 2 runs.

Bad news: he only pitched 3 2/3 innings, and most of the starters bats were dead. WMP looked good though.

Christine, George is right. Don't know how long you've been reading here, but my wife could tell you some tales about the idiotic stuff that comes out of my mouth!

Kaylee said...

I just hope my man Dustin Pedroia aint seriously hurt.Hopwfully come april we wont need that much scoreless relief.ESPECIALLY WHEN BECKETT IS ON THE MOUND:)Could'nt resist that one TED.

Ted D said...

He looked fine kaylee. They just took him out as a precaution I think. Tito and the trainers didn't seem worried.

Come October, you're gonna owe me an apology about Beckett, Kaylee!

Kaylee said...

Christine,I can be crazy alot of the time.Just ask anybody I go to school with:-) In fact,They may think I am crazy all the time:-)

Kaylee said...

I truly hope I dop cause Oweing you an apology can only mean one thing!But,if I owe you one I minus well owe him one too:)

Ted D said...

I'm outa here for now. The wife and I are actually going on an Honest to God date night. My brother-in-law and wife are watching the younguns.

New post later, I hope.