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Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Fear

We've all been scared before: whether it was from something as stupid as a movie or a tv show, or a real life instance like 9-11.

For me, the most afraid I've ever been is when there is something wrong with one of my children and I can't do a stinking thing about it.

When Ciera was 2, she got so sick with a rotovirus she became so dehydrated we had to take her to the ER to get an IV of fluid. Watching my baby girl in that much pain was the toughest thing I had experienced at that point in my life.

Flash forward 8 years or so, and I had to carry my son Trot into the operating room to have tubes put in his ear. Yeah, I know, it's pretty common surgery: YOU carry your child into a room, watch them go under, have to leave them there, then tell me how easy it was for you to do.

Late yesterday, we were told that Rakes, my hard charging little hellion, has a heart murmur. Went in for his 3 year checkup perfect, and comes out with that. Now I'll admit, when Ang called and told me, I pretty much started to freak out. The doc said all the right things: it's common with young children, 99% of the time it goes away, etc....

He sent home a brochure that calls it a "Innocent Heart Murmur", and it goes over how they occur, what they are, and what to look for. It all sounds really comforting, and I'm sure everything will be OK. But when I looked at that little hooligan running around today, I had to fight back the thoughts that kept entering into my head.

When it's YOUR child, the words "innocent" and "heart murmur" just don't add up.

I've got a feeling I'll spend the last few minutes before I go to bed tonight the same way I did last night: standing over my son and talking to the man upstairs.

27 comments:

beckperson said...

first!

Maybe it was meant to be because we know all about heart murmurs at our house. Bob has had one all his nearly 61 years and it has had very little affect on day to day life. Trot will be fine but it does help put things into proper perspective, eh?

I have stopped watching the game - am kinda sorta doing the hide under the table thing. Not losing fair - just want to not lose my mind....

Tex said...

PVs and prayers to ya Ted. Just saying those two words in the same sentence with Rake doesn't compute. I know things will be good. Life has a way in slowing us down though doesn't it?

Christine E. said...

Evening everyone....

Hang in there, Ted...It is a very common thing--as a matter of fact, I have one as well...:-)

Sending tons and tons of positive vibes your way...

Now, I am going to join Becks underneath the table..(sigh)

Crap...

Go Sox!

beckperson said...

Jeez I meant Rakes! I'm definitely out of it tonight. Oooops! So sorry!

Ted D said...

"first"

Becks, you are killing me! That makes me feel a lot better about Rakes knowing Bob has one. It's just so weird looking at him running around like crazy and thinking he's got that. I didn't write this but the doc said it may be hard for him to catch his breath, and Ang and I have noticed that: sometimes it's like he's hyperventilating, so I guess the murmur may be causing that. But thanks becks for the kind words.

Tex, nope: it doesn't compute. And the PV's and prayers are much appreciated. And yeah, life can be a pain sometimes.

Christine, all is not lost: 3-1 and our pen is MUCH better than the Yankee pen. And did you ever see so many seeing eye singles as tonight? Unreal. And you have a heart murmur too? What are the odds that becks husband and you, who read this thing, have this? Thanks: you and becks comments have eased my mind a little bit: I'll just have to believe everything will be OK.

Now: c'mon boys: we need 2 to tie, and 3 to go ahead.

Mattie said...

Bro, you know we're praying for Rakes, and for you and Ang. My nephew Scott was born with a hole in his heart, and is none the worse for it today. God has Rakes in His able hands. If He didn't, you'd have been at the hospital a LOT more than you have been. Trust Him!

Ted D said...

Mattie, I appreciate it, and I know everything will be OK. It's just a kick in the marbles when it happens to your child.

I know he'll be fine, but it doesn't mean I won't worry.

Christine E. said...

Ted:

I am a firm believer that we find the people we need to...:-)

And the shortness of breath can happen--it's does to me sometimes...:-)

and, I have never heard Rivera referred to as "fruitbat"--He really looks like one! That is brilliant!

Crap--its now 4-1

:-(

Mattie said...

I know brother...just trying to encourage you.

On another note...this game blows.

And it ain't over. We may win the division, but right now. they have our freaking number. I don't care how you rationalize it. I do NOT want to face them in the playoffs.

Ted D said...

//I am a firm believer that we find the people we need to...:-)//

:: Thumbs up, Christine::

And I can't take credit for fruitbat: picked it up at Surviving Grady. I'd give credit to who DID come up with it, but I can't remember. Dover maybe? Tex, can you remember?

4-1 Mattie, but 2 innings to go. They beat the O's on Mothers Day down by 5 in the ninth.

Keep the Fair.

Mattie said...

I'll keep the Fair...Here's fair:

Why in the world were you talking all that smack the past few days? Do you realize that these 2 losses are YOUR fault?

Ted D said...

Not my fault, and no smack talking. I'm just not going into the "woe is me" catagory. We have a SIX game lead: do you realize if this was any other division in baseball, they'd be printing the "2007 Division Champion" t shirts right now?

I heard Rob Dibble say on the MLB XM channel today that the Mets have the division sewn up with a 4 game lead? 4 games. We have 6 right now. Dude, 5-3 and 4-3 losses aren't a reason to go jump off a bridge: it's the Sox/Yankees. After tonight, the season record vs NY is 7-7, with 4 to play. That is typical Sox/Yankee stuff. You have got to calm down: a 6 game lead is like a 1-0 lead in that thing you follow on cable. You know, the NHL.

We win the division by AT LEAST 9 games.

CC said...

Matt - Isn't it funny when Ted quots the # lead that the Sox have, and each time he does it, it seems to go down (8, 7, 6...) LOL

Ted - I don't know anything about heart murmurs, but I do know that I would react the same as you. Many Manny point coming Rakes way!

scott h said...

Teddy boy just keep praying that hedge of protection over the little man.

On a lighter note. Being the classic rock guy that I am. I'm thinking what song is going Threw Jr's head right now? one of my favorites is Foreigner. so the song in your head would have to be


HEADGAMES I CAN"T TAKE IT ANY MORE HEADGAMES. I warned you.

Ted D said...

Carol, I'll pass the Manny point along to Rakes. ;)

Bub, they are not in my head, nor are they in the Red Sox players heads.

It's a 6 game lead: same as it was on JUNE THE 4TH. In almost 3 months, the Yankees have made NO headway. THAT is what I keep trying to tell you and corn muffin: this isn't Football, where one or two losses mean the season is over.

The fact you two keep pissing in my corn flakes over every loss is getting a tad bit annoying, considering the Red Sox have been in first place since DAY ONE. Talk about a couple of killjoys. 6 games at this point is like the Sooners having a 49-7 lead over the OSU Cowboys with 1 quarter left to play. Yeah, they COULD come back, but do you really think they will?

You and peat moss need to relax: baseball is 162 games, and even if the Yankees win tomorrow, the lead could be back to 8 by Sunday.

::rant over::

Tex said...

i hate losing to roger.

signed,

tex and josh

scott h said...

Conversation overhead with Ted and his kids a few years down the road.

Hey Mommy tell us that story again about the summer Daddy blew a gasket and had to be sedated after the Sox blew a double digit lead!!!

scott h said...

Two hits, two hits , I don't think you could knockout Fred Sanford with just two hits.

I think you boys better change your plans and come out here this weekend.

Ted deep breathes, its only a game its only a game.

KAYLEE said...

I hate getting swept and Payers to ya and rakes ted!!!!!

Ted D said...

Scotty, I told my Yankee buddy Shawn today that it's more pleasant to talk to him about the Yankees sweeping the Red Sox than some other Red Sox "fans". I've got a sales manager who has been a fan all his life who called me today. "It's over" he said. Makes me want to scream.

In June we had a 4 game lead. On August 30th, we have a 5 game lead.

I'm not worried.

Tex said...

i aint worried either. I just hate losing to those overstuffedlongwindedpinstripedpansy...ok ill stop ranting :)

Stacy said...

OK, Keith is not keeping me updated properly. Ted, I know you're freaking now, but several years back the doctor thought she heard a heart murmur with Libby. She saw a specialist, and he said it was nothing to worry about; I don't think he could even hear it.

God is taking care of our Rakie boy. Maybe that's why he stutters...trying to catch his breath. Let God handle this...He doesn't intend for you to carry this burden.

beckperson said...

Tedders,

You have the right attitude about the last three games. As my husband tells me all the time...the Y******s and Sox are evenly matched when they play together and chances are they will evenly split all the series in any baseball season. IIRC, yesterday they were even and now the pinstriped devils are up by one. Come September's series, it will go back our way. It's a looooong season.

**Sending hugs to you, Angie and Rakes**

Meanwhile, I think I can start watching baseball tomorrow again :-) YAY!

scott h said...

I think it bothers me more when you try and handle this like a mature adult. Go ahead rant and rave it gives me material to work with.

Mattie said...

I'm not as worried about the division as I am facing them as the wild card.

Ted D said...

Tex, glad to hear you're with me!

Stacy, sorry I didn't keep you up to speed: been sorta crazy around here.

Becks, Bobbers sounds like my kind of guy! And you're right, going into today, the season series was 7-7, now 7-8. Typical Yankee/Red Sox year. I think we are pretty much dead even, with a game or two either way, over the last 4 years head to head.

And thanks for the kind thoughts.

The O's should be just the tonic we need!

Ted D said...

SOrry Bub and Mattie: didn't mean to neglect you two. Scotty, I've been trying all year to be reasonable about this season. We got off hot, and the Yankees stumbled. I don't think anyone expected them to play like the DRays all year, and true to form, they have played well.

The Yankees have a 30-18 record since the All Star break: the Red Sox have a 27-19 record for the same time. Pretty freaking close, right? They have three more wins and one less loss.

We have NOT been playing that bad. They've just been on fire, and it can't last. John Sterling, on the XM after the game, said the Red Sox have a 5 game lead with 30 to go. HE said there is no way the Yankees would overtake the Sox: the wildcard is the way they will get in.

So Corn Nut: I'M NOT WORRIED. My team is in first with a 5 game lead, which is a 10 game switch. Won't happen.