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Friday, January 16, 2009

A Letter to The Captain

Tek,

I'm writing this for one reason; come back home.

Yeah, you picked a blood sucker for an agent. And yeah, this off-season hasn't worked out quite like you thought it would.

Who could have seen the economic collapse coming back in October? Other than the 99.9% of us who have to actually work for a living. In an added note, YOU turned down a guaranteed $10 million dollars in arbitration, so I'm not exactly feeling sorry for you right about now.

But I want you back. Red Sox Nation wants you back. And apparently, John Henry wants you back since he's flying to backwater Georgia to try and convince you to drop this multi-million dollar nonsense and come to your senses.

You love this team. You love this fan base.

Are you SERIOUSLY going to let us go into the 2009 season with Josh Bard as the starting catcher? If nothing else, think of the harm it will do to Wake and his fragile mental state.

You are the captain, Tek. Not Papi, not Pedie, and most definately not Papelbon. (I know you don't want a guy who'll parade around Fenway in his boxers with a Bud Light box on his head to lead this team). Tell Boras to go pound sand where the sun don't shine and just sign on the dotted line.

Sincerely,

Your demented #1 fan.

(Hey. It worked for Annie Wilkes.)

7 comments:

Tex said...

oh, and Ive jumped out of a perfectly good airplane



So Tek...get with the program and sign on the dotted line

HorshamScouse said...

Bard, Brown, Kottaras and Wagner.

Attorneys at Law and Commissioners for Oaths.

Ted D said...

Tex, I always knew you were a little bit nuts; this only confirms my suspicions. ;)

And Horsham, I just don't buy Bard as the #1. I may be wrong, but I'm not real comfortable going into the season with him as the starter. We'll see....

Rich in the garage said...

I said it on SG and ill say it here, With Tek back and this staff there is NO WAY we dont win the division.

Ted D said...

I agree, Rich. And I still don't think Tek is done yet; he's got a few more good years left in him.

Cyn said...

You're so much more eloquent than I, Ted. My letter would have read:

Dear Tek,

Stop being a dink.

Love, Cyn

Ted D said...

Thanks, Cyn. And yours would have worked as well. ;)